under another sun

A good day. Sent a message to Bob, whose birthday it is, and in the evening Lorraine and I scooted across to Brighton, where we met Klaudia and Oskar in the Cow to celebrate Anton's birthday. Anton arrived, having cooked his mum some dinner, and we scooted over to the nearby Murasaki where we strapped on a nice Japanese nosebag. Oskar adventurously ordering octopus ball starters, and an eel main course. Lorraine and I  loved spending time with my Godbairns and Anton, who was looking pretty chipper. We gave him a lovely edition of The Count of Monte Christo. Klaudia all set to start her MA, and Oskar planning his next assault on his modelling career. The two of them are lovely, thoughtful people.  Otherwise wrote today, and went for a walk this afternoon in Tide Mills. I've fallen out of the habit of long walks as it was too hot, having preferred the air-conditioned gym during the hottest UK summer on record. But now it is cool enough to walk. The hedges are groaning with black...

Up early and into my study with a new sense of purpose. Began looking at a story that was rejected last week, but with a highly encouraging note from the editor. Also the idea that if One Day Forever is being published, that tidies away quite a few poems, leaving room for the new project.  Being me, my mind is busy creating a thousand reasons why it will all go wrong, but I just have to ignore them. I have been contacting people slowly, as I feel superstitious about it. But today I let Carl and Bob know.   Penny came round this morning, to spend some time with Lorraine. I spoke to her for a while. Her mother died recently, and she is naturally still sad. She was very kind and congratulated me on the book. They made off into Seaford, for a bite to eat, and I had a much-needed gym session. I seem to have put on weight since Monday.  Spoke to Mum, who was fine, although there is a small problem with the car that Ben is helping her with.  In the evening, when Lorraine w...

Off this morning to Trafalgar Square to meet Bob under the usual lion. However the square had been cordoned off and there was a big stage there where people were rehearsing songs from High School Musical. An affront to human decency I called it. I was early, and it was hot, but luckily Bob was already there and we hopped into Pret for a cold drink of water and a sandwich. There after a good deal of catching up, we decided to go to the Zurbarán exhibition in The National. It was rather fabulous, full of imposing and brilliant paintings, loaded with meanings, and I write  more about it here .  We went ambling about having beers and catching up. We'd not met up this year, so there was loads to discuss. He was in top form, however, and we had a good laugh. We visited the Salisbury, which of course is a trusty favourite, then off to The Seven Stars, which makes me think of Bleak House because it is deep in the legal part of town, then to the Cittie of York, where we sat conspirator...

Up early again enjoying sitting at my desk and thinking about words. After breakfast and Sylwia arriving Lorraine went off to Rhyme Time, and I spent a few hours editing the Kansas story, which I think is going to be called The Follower Followed or maybe just The Follower.  I hacked hundreds of words from it, and probably needs a bit more. It's still over six thousand words and its completion has been hampered by being ill and so on. Taking lots of time over something doesn't necessarily equal quality though.   I had a bite to eat, and then popped around to Melissa's house for a review of my drawings, which soon evolved into talking about art and life more generally. She's thinking of doing a performance piece later in the year, and is a properly creative person. I left with lots to think about. Talking with Melissa helped me realise I have been putting too much weight on the drawing and should just trust myself to explore the possibilities, rather than being goal focus...

Off to London this morning to meet Bob, as he put it 'under the usual lion' in Trafalgar Square. On the train I spoke to Mum, and very sadly she had to have Felix put down, as he was very ill. Wynford went with Mum to the vet, and was really helpful. I sent him a text to thank him. Mum obviously very sad. Bob and I had a lovely day. We lurked near the National Gallery, and a coffee, and then after going through the market that has sprung up on the edge of Trafalgar Square,  we went into the National to see a small exhibition by Joseph Wright of Derby. It was an example of Tenebrism, paintings showing people lit only by the light of candles, or in one case the light of a white hot poker, and everything falling back into darkness. A thin exhibition to be honest, and Bob and I knew one of the main exhibits which is in the permanent exhibition. But still fascinating and thought provoking. Then back into the Trafalgar Square where we bought two bratwurst hot dogs from a German sausa...

A glance at my phone revealed I had my first full state pension payment. Trying not to look at it as money for nothing, but cheering anyway. Looked at tax stuff with Mum this morning, and printed things off to send to her in a stamped addressed envelope. A walk, post office, and a bit of shopping. Decided to subscribe to Poetry Salzburg, PayPal glitched and I ended up paying twice. Sigh. More walking, then it rained but Bob called which was very cheering and we have booked a day to meet up soon. Lorraine off to her personal trainer, and then went to her physio and a walk with Beth by the seaside. Not much going on but my mood is improving steadily. 

Off to London this morning to see Bob and Carl on what was Carl's 67th birthday. I met Bob first and we found a pub to sip some soft drinks and then, having received a message, met Carl loitering outside the National Portrait Gallery. Under a leather jacket, he was sporting a Munch's scream, teeshirt except the figure was Charlie Brown. Off to the pub for a quick pint in the Chandos before we returned to look at the Munch portrait exhibition in the NPG. We all enjoyed this lots -- really absorbing and psychological portraits. Carl zooming about ahead of course, and Bob and I a bit more methodical. We were also pointed to another room we paid particular attention to a room full of Stanisław Wyspiański (1869-1907) pictures also excellent.  Mainly though the day was about talking, and catching up with each other and hear about the families. Bob's daughter Millie about to graduate, Carl's Ellie pressing on with her podcast with her pal Jade, called Really F*cking Trying -- ...

 Off to see Bob in London today. We met under Nelson's column as usual. While waiting I noticed that   Whitehall was jammed with a hundred tractors jamming the road as the farmer's protested inheritance tax changes. Met Bob and it was a fine thing to see him. We spent the day mooching about between cafes, and had some food in Wagamama's and popped into Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese and Ye Olde Mitre, historic old pubs to suit us venerable old chaps. But we were extremely restrained with the drinking. Mainly we spent the day talking and catching up. Bob lost his mother fairly recently and is obviously still processing this. His daughter is doing very well at university, and was producing and directing a student pantomime. Lovely to see how proud he is of Milly. We ended up in a noisy bar, full of people fresh from work and barking loudly at each other, and music playing really loudly. It actually made me feel stressed, straining to hear what Bob was saying and so on. Times have ch...

I learned from Julia that her and Bob's mum had died yesterday. Messaged Bob of course.  Happily working at my desk this morning. Generous amounts of rain hosing from the sky. Spoke to Mum, who was not enjoying the weather and was off to the Waggon pub later, for a bit of fun. She'd gone to another meeting in Edgware where they were playing Bingo which she thought was a bit of a pointless game. Also spoke to Anton, off this weekend taking his Mum to stay with Uncle John in Spain.  Sylwia here for a few hours making the house look spick and span. Lorraine at Pat and Maureen's to take a doctor's call with Maureen. At lunchtime I mooched around to Osborne's fish and chips, picked up a pensioner's box with two fish, and more fish and chips and Mushy peas and  had lunch with Pat and Maureen and Lorraine in the flat. The sea less lively today. I love how Pat is enjoying seeing the ferry come in and they both get quite caught up by all the goings on, like a yacht race ...

A hot and lovely day. Started off tinkering with some poems, but instead felt like doing stuff. This translated into hanging a couple of pictures on the wall, and tidying my study up while Lorraine sat at my desk filling in some hideous legal forms.  I then went to the gym, having decided to rejoin. I have become fat again after a year or so of being at the thin end of my personal spectrum, the hateful ventripotence is back. So I rejoined the gym today, and I am to return to more disciplined eating.  Off this evening to Hove, actually, by bus too. Seaford to North Street fairly quick, then another bus across to Hove, a purchase of cold beer from the co-op and then we sauntered down to the beach to celebrate Innis's birthday. Innis, Rosie, Eve and a neighbour friend called Rob and his two grown up children. Then Julia and Jess arrived on bicycles, triggering Rosie and Lorraine to join them in the sea. Innis's pal Phil turned up, who I'd gone to see Michael Kiwanuka with pre-...

To Seaford station, looking at the sea, before zooming up to Victoria via Lewes. At Victoria a voice on the tannoy asking for someone with medical training to urgently go to the gate we were all crowding through.  Welcome to London. Tube to Embankment, and The Salisbury to meet Bob and Carl.  Excellent to see them both. Weird how quickly being together feels entirely normal. After some discussion we decided to go to the After Impressionism exhibition round the corner in the National. A decent exhibition, with some paintings that were new to me. I enjoyed seeing After the Sermon by Gaugin again, one of my favourite paintings. We enjoyably mooched around there, Carl in signature style not wasting time on work he didn't like much, Bob refraining from waving his fingertip three or four millimetres above the surface of the paintings so all well.  Then we tubed to Hammersmith and lurked along the river talking about old times and catching up some of the news while dropping in ...

Needed aid from Lorraine to get up in the middle of the night as my back had seized up and I couldn't move without whimpering. I took a diazepam when I woke up, which is a muscle relaxant and helped with the spasming, and made me feel nonchalant about being unable to put my socks on.   I gingerly got out of bed, Lorraine was dealing with Chris the plumber arrived first thing and began the business of replacing the boiler and water tank. He had to leave this afternoon, however, to get emergency dental treatment.   Lorraine, who is looking a tad slimmer these days, off to her personal trainer at lunch. She returned with canes for the raspberries and food from Morrisons.  Bob phoned walking his dog saying we should go to see Carl.  Shortly after, Anton called to tell me he had begun the construction of his glider tailplane. Some of the balsa pieces are a few millimetres thin, and breakable balsa apparently.   Delighted to receive email from MSR for the first time s...

Up to London today, meeting Bob in Trafalgar Square. Met up and had a quick coffee and a roll in a Prêt. We discussed exhibitions to see, as is our wont. The cafe was noisy and he reeled off a list of options, including a fascinatingly postmodern one called 'Debussy and Freud'. I mentioned this seemed very interesting but it turned out this was actually Lucian Freud, which we went to see. But not before having a single pint in the Salisbury.  Thence into the exhibition. Enjoyable without being life changing. Freud's penchant for repulsive looking flesh tones always makes me feel weird, despite their obvious skill. On only one occasion did Bob point at a painting with his finger hovering three or four millimetres over the priceless surface, a habit that makes me, and assorted staff nervous. Thought provoking stuff. Then we mooched off to Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese a long time haunt. Today we were able to get a seat in the little bar, where a Welsh guy began chatting to us. Then...

In a bit of a frenzy trying to get everything done this morning. The Germans asking me to tweak the copy, which I did rapidly. Then, thanks to Robin's rapid response, I was able to upload the podcast. I ordered a cab with my new taxi app, and zoomed off to Hove Polyclinic for the second time this week. Hove  Polyclinic makes me feel sad, as I last went there with Janet.   Today I was twenty minutes early, and had to wait half an hour. The Phlebotomy nurse exclaimed in horror when she saw my arms: Where are they?  Meaning my elusive veins. However she struck oil with the first jab.  Another cab home, to do a few more bits and pieces urgently, and have a bite to eat. Bob called, and there is a Spring meeting in the offing. Then yet another cab (rule of three). The cabby sharing his opinions, 'no offence... but people coming down from London have ruined Brighton.' Arrived at the Saint George's Inn a couple of streets below the hospital at the same moment as Anton. ...

Lorraine working from home, but feeling ill again. Taking care of her as best I can.  Assorted freelance shenanigans today. I am finding this kind of thing increasingly tiresome. The job I was supposed to start this Thursday has been bumped. I had been strung along for a few days waiting for them to finalise the details.  It may have started next week, but as I received another offer of work with Keith starting on Thursday I accepted this instead. Spoke to Keith, groggy and horrible after his Pfizer jab the day before.  Felt upbeat as the day ended, and as if things were more in control. Podcast editing most of the day. And a walk at the end of the day up to the Hillfort and had a good chat with Mum while I was roaming about around sundown. I was wanting to go up to Edgware to take Mum and Mas out on Christmas Day, but there seems nowhere to go, and we agreed it was better to do it a bit afterwards. Chats with Anton, and then Bob during the day too. Bob and I are hoping t...

A good start this morning, wrote a new short poem, which for better or worse arrived fully formed. I normally scorn the idea of writing prompts, but I was thumbing through my lemon yellow notebook of bits I sometimes jot down out of books, and was sparked by something I'd copied in there by Roland Barthes. Chatted to Keith for an hour today, talking about business and doing a bit of planning, and a bit of gossip.  Had a chat with Mum today, and will migrate north next week for a day to see her. Then I mooched off to the gym, clambered onto the cross trainer for the third time this week, but soon felt rather bushed and cut the session a bit short. In fact I suddenly realised I was feeling rather tired. Walked back across Preston Park, I was thumbing my phone for the next podcast but then women began screaming and shouting made me look up to see chaotic scenes involving four women and as many dogs. One woman's dog had seized a smaller one and was savaging it. As I made my way tow...

A curiously frustrating day, feeling stressed and unable to make progress in any direction.  Anton and I investigated the walking around Guernsey plan but the price the Barbarie were charging was too hefty so we have parked that for the time being. Also plane fares start at a very reasonable £59 each way, but as soon as you want to take a small suitcase with you, you can expect to pay an extra sixty quid for the round trip. Had another go at sorting out the Natwestisögur but failed. Was told my existing complaints person would get back to me.  Anton and Bob's birthdays today. I sent fond messages to Bob, and in the evening Lorraine, Sam and I made off down to the Shahi to have a celebratory curry with Anton, Anne, Klaudia and Oskar. A cheery evening, Anton on good form. We had got him a historical print of a map of Poland when we were in Hay on Wye.  Meanwhile young Klaudia very businesslike these days, having given up her job in McDonalds for a better paid gig on the Pie...

A poor night's sleep, despite the virtue of the windowless room being the deep darkness to sleep in. I was woken by a ping on my phone: an automated message from my bank saying that I was about to go overdrawn on the new business account. Which means cheques are still being presented against my new account, and the problem is still ongoing. Was cross about this, which was rubbish.  A full English breakfasts, with black pudding. A happy day, and beautiful weather to begin with. We set off and visited Salisbury Cathedral. Lovely place, with a bit of nice stained glass. We loved a modern font there, which had beautiful inscriptions on it. One "I called you by name and you are mine" I found curiously moving.  Nice to be mooching in the Cathedral, and looking at old tombs and treasures, and listening as a churchman said the Lord's Prayer at noon. We liked the Cloisters too, outside, and popped in to see one of the original copies of the Magna Carter written closely in Lati...

A poem to proof this morning, which is always nice. Will appear in a wee mag called Finished Creatures later this month I think. Off around lunchtime to Salisbury. Felt excellent to be setting off on an adventure, even if it weren't that far as the crow flies. En route I was contacted by Val from Paris about a job, but she was fine with me starting it after I'd been away, which was great.   A pleasant drive, and we arrived at a little hotel by the river Avon called the Rose and Crown. Our room odd in that it only had a velux window. There was a photo on the wall of what we might be looking at if there had been a window. Outside however, was very nice. We went for a mooch across an old Bridge and turning left down De Vaux Place and along by some fields and past Salisbury Cathedral.  We wandered into town a little, and I bought myself a bargain pair of light summer shoes, and we stopped off at the big market square and found a table outside a pub, and had a couple of drinks ther...

Lorraine off to work, before I had even struggled out of bed having got up in the night.  Spent much of the day editing the podcast, broken by a walk up the hill in the grey and drizzle, while listening to Bleak House. The audiobook is read, absolutely fabulously, by Miriam Margolyes. Such a great book.  Had chats with Anton, and a long catch up with Bob, who was an optimistic mood -- he seems positive we'll meet later in the year for a beer. Spoke also to Mum and was saddened to hear that her neighbour's behaviour will now necessitate talking to solicitors. He is threatening to build a fence down their shared path. It seems lockdown makes crazy crazier. I will help as much as I can. But lockdown of course makes nothing easier. Lorraine home and was fed mashed up new potatoes and sausages. She played her computer game on the big screen for a while, but was persistently swallowed by a creature that stripped her avatar of its shield. I sipped a glass of aquavit again tonight....