under another sun

Woke up after a good night's sleep at Mum's, and had breakfast. Mum had bought some avocados so I had a cheeky avocado on toast. Once teas were drunk and chats were had, then we had a photo session trying to find the idea spot to take a photo of Mum. This surprisingly difficult, and we tried several locations and arrangements of lights and so on. Once done we filled out the online forms for her to renew her passport. Mum said she was looking her age. But I think she looks fantastic for her age. Then we made off at lunchtime to the Jolly Badger, and its lovely kind waitress who remembers exactly what Mum wants, and prompted me to use my app to get money off too.    The weather showery and overcast. And we sat looking out of the window trying to imagine what sunshine might look like.  Fond farewells to Mum, and then I mooched to Mill Hill Broadway, and was home a few hours later. Nice to be back on the gold sofa with Lorraine, with Brian affectionately pulling a hole in my ...

To London today, on a mission to kill two birds with one stone. Trains to Mill Hill Broadway station, reading Greek Lessons by Han Kang on the train a bit. Hopped on the 221 and got off the stop after Mill Hill East. Reaching Gordon Road paused by a fence looking into the allotment and fiddled with my camera. A deep and violent baying from an unseen Arthur Conan Doyle style hound from inside a van right behind me made me jump out of my skin. Then mooched about a bit and this time went down the alleyway at the back of the house my paternal grandparents lived in when I was a little child. A bit eerie and overgrown, with mostly disused garages. Snapped a couple of shots and left again. Somehow having a camera lessened the feeling people would take me for a mature burglar.  This obscure mission completed, off to meet Mum in the Jolly Badger, pausing at Costa coffee for a much needed perk.  Mum had just arrived at the Jolly Badger when I got there and had had a wretched morning. A...

Woke up at six thirty, with Joy next door dragging a wheeley-bin down by the side of the house. Got up at seven thirty, and after breakfast and various cat businesses, made off to the Seaford Station for a flying visit to the Smoke. On my travels I read a chunk more of 'A sketch of the past' a memoir by Virginia Woolf. Fascinating, and luminous in parts. I find myself making lots of notes in the margin. I have read several of her books and forget just what a brilliant writer she is. She has a way, for example, of inserting the precise name of a plant or tree, that makes a sentence work brilliantly. And at one point used the image of a Cathedral for her childhood. Eventually made it to The Jolly Badger where I met Mum. Had an enjoyable lunch and chat in there. Mum sporting her new sketchers shoes, and we had a conversation, among many others, about premium bonds, as she is an advocate. She said, with some satisfaction, that she made £150 last month.   A slow journey back home, b...

Up early and had another morning looking at Mum's hoard of photographs. I am finding this quite therapeutic in a way, seeing all those familiar faces many of them now having joined the majority.  I like the idea of good times in the past, and seeing myself looking fairly cheery in a variety of situations. I like seeing things just at the edge of what I can remember. I think Mum felt a bit sad seeing all those people too, she is aware of her aloneness at the moment.  Unlike yesterday, it was rainy and cool again. Mum and I went to the Jolly Badger for lunch, very crowded for rainy Tuesday afternoon. Enjoyed the bowls of salad, and chicken there, washed down with a solitary Guinness.    There was a worry about thunder too, and Mum unplugged things when she went back. I walked off in the rain to Mill Hill Broadway station, and had another smooth journey home. I listened to Will's book and I am still enjoying it. Texted Simon, as I found a photo of him and another friend...

Up and having avocado on toast with Mum. She had her covid jab yesterday, and her arm was a bit painful but otherwise okay. Mum had not been able to get the new carpet cleaner to work, and bits of a spring valve had fallen out when she tried to get it going. I was able to piece it together and thankfully the machine sprang back into life, and I set about the carpets. Certainly an improvement, but not a transformation. Then we looked at Mum's hideous tax things, but after finding all the stuff, the actual tax form to be completed was missing -- mum later called them and got them to resend. One good thing:  the parking fines mum had during the time her car was stolen -- and we disputed -- have finally been dropped. A little victory over jobsworth bastards. I texted Wynford, to say Mum and I were thinking of him, as he was taken to hospital recently. He replied saying he should be out on Monday. He has been very kind to Mum. After a while, off to The Jolly Badger. On our way in, we bu...

Up and getting myself ready to go to Edgware. Calliope subdued and not moving much.  I called Mum but she was on the line to the Police as her car had been stolen this morning. Later Mum told me that Ben across the road's security cameras caught a car arriving a little after 5am, one man got out removed a headlight, and stucking his arm into the car and somehow turning it on and driving off with it. Bastards stole it from their disabled parking spot, with Mason's disabled pass in it.  To add to the general joy, on my way to Seaford Station Anton called telling me that his old schoolfriend Stav, who I'd met two or three times and had rather liked, had died. Anton obviously gutted about this, as they had been friends for decades. I made my way up to Mill Hill broadway. Doing some freelance work on the train. While walking to Edgware I called Mum, and she said they wanted to go to go to the Jolly Badger for lunch. I was a few yards away from the place, but I was a bit doubtful...

Both up early. I weighed myself this morning, and my holiday made me increase weight again slightly. Back to normal food now.   Reading some of  Changing, poems based on the I Ching by Richard Berengarten en route to see Mum and Mas in the Jolly Badger.  I arrived just as Mum and Mas were arriving. Mas somewhat unsteady on his feet even with a stick these days. Mum also getting over a cold and with a nasty cough. Mum said she had a scrape in the car yesterday too, following hard on the heels of the car suddenly conking out in the middle of the road last week, which was really stressful. Otherwise a pleasant enough bite to eat.  Helped myself to large salad portions, and had some chicken and rice. A kind server. Mas quite tired after a bit, and Mum took him home.  I walked back to Mill Hill station, and had a decent enough journey home. I shall go up again soon. Nice to be home, and to be home for the rest of the week. Below a snap from Seaford Station platform...

A thundery night, but up fairly early, and scarfed a solitary breakfast and made off to Seaford station leaving Lorraine with a cup of tea. It was just starting to rain again. Up to London, working on various things. Signed onto the onboard wifi and got an email from the editor of a Scottish magazine called Dreich Magazine & Press (byeline: 'Made in Scotland from Words')  saying he wanted to use all four of the poems I had sent him a few days ago -- these were Eat this Poem , yay! I finally found a home for this bad boy, plus X-ray style , Homesick , and Ye Olde Majority Inn (first draft written in the Wellington in Seaford). This cheering. Also a nice text from Palo Almond saying she would be up to discuss a collaboration. Also cheering. So to the Jolly Badger, where Mum and Mas were just arriving. Had lunch with them, quite busy for a Monday, and the place full of smoke from the kitchen area as usual. Mum okay, and Mason seemed not too bad, though his mobility is not go...

After a poor night's sleep, up to see Mum and Mas this morning, reading and writing on the trains, including  Bold Move , my Dr Luana Marques. She describes how our response to anxiety can go three ways, fight, flight or freeze. People either react immediately or angrily, the deny the problem and bury themselves in everything that isn't the actually stressful thing, or they freeze in place, staying in the job or relationship or other situation that is unsatisfactory.  I have definitely frozen before, when two of personal values meet head on, such as loyalty and being true to yourself for example in a relationship. Arranged to meet my old school friend Peter Hoibak in Brighton next week, for a drink after 40 years.   Did some of my own writing in short burst that I was pleased with on the train.  Met Mum and Mas in the Jolly Badger, arriving at exactly the same time as them. I chose a good meal, with lots of salad, some lean chicken and a bit rice, washed down with a ...

Off to the Jolly Badger this morning walking to Seaford station under blue skies. Trained up to Mill Hill very easily. Took my MacBook Air and actually did some good work in between train hopping. I am working on a loose idea, and am just splurging words down at the moment in messily uncritical kind of way. A bit early reaching Mill Hill, so I mooched down a few side streets to see what there was to see. Most of the side streets are cul-de-sac and dead ends, and the houses are big and wealthy seeming.   To the Jolly Badger, where I bought a pint of Guinness and waited till  Mum and Mas arrived. Mas had his Covid jab yesterday, and he seemed a bit unsteady, and was quite sleepy. Mum okay, and had a pint of cider. The food was okay, and the waiter cheery, and had lived in Brighton before swapping it all for Edgware. Mason asked to be let out the fire escape door, as this was closer to the zoomy new white car. I promised to go up again soon. I made my way back, a bit of a slow jo...

Up to see Mum and Mas today. Caught the train at Seaford just before nine and had a fairly smooth journey train hopping till I reached Mill Hill. En route Mum texted me to say the pesky new car didn't start -- and there had been a confusing time having got the people round to fix it, who refused because it was the new car and the paperwork wasn't right. Anyway, luckily they arrived at The Jolly Badger in one piece in the car that Ben across the road had made work.  Pleasant food and a nice young Spanish guy serving. It must be one of those days at the Jolly Badger when they have a half decent chef. I had a couple of pints of steadying Guinness and Mum had a cider. Both Mum and Mas were both okay, though a bit stressed by the morning, and wondering if the car would start again. It did, fortunately. The car itself looks rather sporty to me (given that I know nothing about cars) and is a hybrid, so when mum turned it on when I was there, it seemed to make little or no noise. Fond ...

A bit more recording this morning with Robin and a bit of writing.  Today mostly a day of gardening. We are loving being out there.  The evil buddleia all but vanquished now. Lots of moving things around in the garden too. I piled bricks and tiles into the little brick shed. It is only about five foot five high, and has a corrugated low roof dense with spider webs. I used my head as a duster a dozen times, and felt like I was alive with spiders. I saw some beefy ones today. Lorraine bringing order to the workhouse too, after lots of sterling work in the garden. Mum called to say she reversed her car into a wall in the car park of the Jolly Badger yesterday, and the car is to be written off. Luckily she and Mas were completely unharmed, and the Jolly Badger folks very kind, and gave them coffee and a taxi ride home. Mum seemed okay about it but it must have been a shaking experience. Fish pie tonight. Lorraine and I feeling the effects of working physically for hours. No need f...

Off today to Mill Hill to see Mum and Mas. The journey from Ashford on the high speed train into St Pancras -- around 35 minutes -- is revolutionary compared to the journey of over an hour and a half from Brighton to St Pancras on Thameslink. Mooched to The Jolly Badger in good time.  Lovely to see Mum and Mas, although the Jolly Badger has slipped a bit. Where once it was deeply average it is now nudging dire.  An irritating manager type running about when I arrived. Have you booked? he said as we asked for a table. Literally three other people in the restaurant of about 80 covers. Our server the familiar silent one, who speaks  only with deep reluctance. Meanwhile some kind of power tool carpentry project going on around the corner in the restaurant. Mason, quite chatty, however, about a plan he has for Arnold Schwarzenegger, the Ukraine, and the Waggon and Horses, before wondering off to chat with other Jolly Badger patrons.   Mum and Mas kindly gave me a hedge st...

A quick meeting with Keith this morning, then off by train to Mill Hill to meet Mum and Mas in the Jolly Badger. Did some work on the podcast on the way up and had a chance to think. Have set up a podcast recording with Pete next week. There is something about being on a train which is quite conducive to thinking, in the way that being on a plane with its attendant existential terror doesn't quite match -- and even tinkered briefly with a poem. Looked at the BBC weather app before I went and it said there was no rain in London. Obviously it was raining but I managed to miss it when it rained hard while we were in the Jolly Badger gnawing on ribs. Good to see Mum and Mas. Their car is due its MOT and Maheena apparently offered to wash it, but it is only the complex life forms that are establishing themselves in the paintwork that are holding it together. Mas more mobile now, and clearly much better after his fall. He wandered about talking to people off and on, but he was having fun...

A very warm day, and off to Edgware writing a list of things that needed to be sorted out.  Very hot and close in Edgware. But by the time I reached Mum she had managed to find out which ward he was in and make an appointment for a visit at 3pm. He was now in the AAU ward. Her lovely neighbour Maheena had offered to drive us to Barnet Hospital. Mum a bit shattered by everything. It is very stressful for her, not knowing what is going on.  Mum says Maheena is an angel and talks about her having feathers because she has been so kind to Mum and Mas. She helps them when she can and did shopping for them in covid times, and was happy to drive us to hospital. We arrived very early, but when I asked they allowed her in. There was a policy of only one visitor per person, but they let me go too.  Mas conscious and quite talkative. He has broken ribs, but they are checking for other stuff. His hearing aids weren't working so he when he told us the man opposite looked like a skeleto...

Lorraine off to school to let workmen in and so on today. I got up and did a bit of writing before heading off to the Jolly Badger at Mill Hill to see Mum and Mason. An enjoyable train journey, reading Jia Jiang's book Rejection Proof . Most writers often have to deal with rejection of course. One idea hit me with some force. Although I am finding my acceptances/rejections ratio has distinctly improved recently -- but always have the sense editors choose what seems to me safer work. There is a temptation to write in that way to see more of your work in print. But if what you are writing is safe, it will never be remembered.  A big difference to going to the Jolly Badger from the last time I was up here. Not the sweltering heat, in fact although it is still warm, the day was overcast threatening rain that did not come.  We were shown to the same table as before, and the guy even remembered what we all drank too. Mum and Mas on good form. It works really well me zooming up for a...

Up to Mill Hill by train. Used my Senior Railcard, which was ace and I saved some money. I met Mum and Mas in The Jolly Badger. Nice to see them. Mas on good form. Mum had been back to the hospital this morning to complete her tests. She is being philosophical about the results, and saying that she is very pleased that Toby and I are so happy in our marriages. The results are due next week and I will go up next week too. Otherwise a cheery time, and the food much improved on the last time I was there. Mum and Mas took some chips home for the birds. Home, and the train delayed for some reason. A delivery of vegetables and fish on the doorstep. Luckily the fish in a polystyrene box full of ice.  Lorraine home, and then had a long call with Angie and Richard in Seaford. Angie has to have an op next week.  Escaped into Star Trek. Went to bed, but woke up and sat up reading about Boris Johnson's downfall sipping chamomile tea for an hour or so, till I felt tired again. Boris set to...

Up early and off to Edgware after I did some writing and a wee bit of stuff for the podcast. Turns out the people we have asked to concrete our front path were to start today. Nine o'clock, shortly before I had to leave, a bloke started hammering outside. The broken concrete path came up easily. I walked down to Preston Park again, and trained it up to Mill Hill Broadway. The faux first train compartment offering me the opportunity to do some work up to St Pancras away from the hammering. Met with Mum and Mason at the Jolly Badger, which is a Harvester. Sam said yesterday to ask for the 'set' menu. There was a senior set there, including an 80th birthday party and one overworked waitress, who kept saying no worries . Mason seeming okay given the alarms early in the week. I had a rack of ribs, and two pints of Guinness. Chatted to Mum, reminding her that she was not alone and to ask for help if things get difficult. Mason able to wander off to kindly pay the bill, and of cou...