Fantastic voyage Lorraine drove me off to hospital today after I had employed a home enema kit. Not too long later I had the dubious pleasure of having a tube inserted where the sun has never shone. I had a splendid Irish nurse, and when not jabbering to her in Woody Allen mode, I was eyeing the screen which was showing a movie of the world's pinkest tube train journey as the camera moved up inside my guts. It reminded me of that movie The Fantastic Voyage , where a submarine is miniturised, and injected into someone's body. It's not a movie I wanted to be in, but still a fascinating experience. The most uncomfortable thing is that they pump you full of air, which is disconcerting. Then wheeled out, given a cup of tea, and released back into the wild, having been told that they'd seen nothing of note. Every single person who dealt with me at the Royal Sussex County Hospital was pleasant and efficient. Lorraine waiting nicely for me in the waiting room and we pushed off....