Am in poor spirits tonight. The agency is having one of its spasmodic and ill-considered reoganisations. This time I have fallen foul of it, and it seems I will have to resign or face complete humiliation. I wrote my resignation email today but have decided to sleep on it. I have creatively led the part of the agency that has grown the most over the last two years, however I was told today that it needs "real leadership" and have effectively been demoted.

After enduring a conversation of breathtaking hypocrisy with my boss this morning, I was put off my stroke and went on to have a very poor day indeed.

The evening though was a little more fun. Went out with some ex colleagues including Paula. It was very good to see her, something about Paula makes me feel very reassured and grounded. She was telling me about a recent and very powerful Reiki experience. I listened with interest having been on a Reiki course for a weekend several years ago and I found it good in that it prompted me to think about healing. I also experienced some quite odd sensations, however I began to lose faith in it after a while.

Rattling home on the Brighton train full of curry and a few beers I found myself in need of a hug. I began thinking about Indian mystics who dole out hugs full of unconditional love and decided I needed one of those. Oddly, none was forthcoming.