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A sad perspective

Feverish cold this morning. Missed my drawing class. Stayed in bed, till about 11. I called Mum, who had seen Steve and some of her old Waggon and Horses pals yesterday, which she really enjoyed.  Anne is still in intensive care. Although she is bright and with it, her condition is sadly inoperable. She and Anton have had a harrowing time. Anna has been brilliant, and Klaudia and Oskar have been with their grandmother lots too. Anton sounds shattered.  Otherwise did a bit of zine work from the comfort of my armchair, and generally hung about being taken care of by Lorraine who has been lovely, despite still not feeling great herself. Feeling a bit rough due to flu, put perspective by what Anton's dealing with. I definitely felt better at the end of the day than I had at the beginning of it.  Lorraine and I watching Traitors tonight, Also an interview with Sting. What creatives need, Sting said, was a wound, a place and a voice.

The inevitable

Feeling poor today, and this evening I had a fever and was streaming. Boo to it. A sweaty feverish night. It was inevitable. Had to bump seeing Patrick and Andrew tonight to listen to Patrick's new tunes, including Swimming Pool, which was a drag.  A productive day, thought, thanks to Lorraine. I finished doing the zines, and printed them out. Lorraine is doing covers for them out of fabric. They look great. She is a marvel. 

Swimming Pool

Patrick sent me a sound file today of Swimming Pool . I'd given him a bunch of words about a year ago, and one idea he's put to floorboard troubling hard rock style, and you can imagine people in some American Stadium losing their minds over it. An amazing job.  Otherwise Lorraine still fluey, and me feeling tired and listless with sore sinuses, but better than Lorraine so taking care of her. Not much to report really. I worked on my zines a bit. Enjoying re-reading Something Wicked This Way Comes , by Ray Bradbury. Not too taxing, but with some lovely moments of exuberance in it.

Gold sofa birthday

A rainy Monday. My birthday too. Unfortunately Lorraine unwell today with this fluey cold. She brought me a cup of tea in bed, and some lovely Lewis Caroll books bought from Much Ado Books. While we were sipping tea in bed, Beth arrived with a card and some presents too, which was very sweet of her. Later I got a moonpig card with myself holding Enzo on it.  Otherwise it was a bit of a non-event. I had little or no energy and sore sinuses and headache. Lorraine on the sofa with flu. But it was actually really quite nice to spend time together. Also lots of time cheerily replying to messages on Social media and so on. Heard from all kinds of people, including cousin Wendy, and Alice Lee, I'd not heard from for many years. Also Tobs just about to fly from California having seen Alex, and Mum. Anton I heard from briefly. He's going through a brutal time at the moment and my heart goes out to him.

Pies and paramedics

Woken up first thing with an emergency call from Maureen.  Lorraine zoomed around and called an ambulance. When the paramedics arrived some time later, palpitations and drop in blood pressure had all steadied.  In a bit of a holding pattern, being in a state of readiness to zoom over and take care of Pat if Maureen and Lorraine went to hospital, I only managed to do a bit of work, and also have a long chat with Mum.   After two, I walked over to sea and met Lorraine, and we had a nice walk along the sea in the sunshine. Sitting on one of the fish seats at splash point, while an older woman was doing the plank on another of the benches, while getting what I guessed was her son to film her. This in between Lorraine explaining to me how to make the roux for a fisherman's pie. I made my way home. Feeling a tad weary. Later,  Lorraine, returned sniffing vigorously having succumbed to the inevitable and caught whatever has been ailing Pat and Maureen. I cooked th...

Discombobulated

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Lorraine again off to Pat and Maureen's place early.  I felt a bit discombobulated without Lorraine. I tided the house, and mucked about with my new pastime: zines. Because I was felt sluggish and a bit coldy, I went for long walk which helped lots. At lunchtime I popped into see Pat and Maureen, and take them fish and chips, make a cup of tea and hang out for a bit. Lorraine being marvellous as usual, and taking care of them cheerfully. Maureen up, but not looking well. Pat definitely better than he was earlier this week.  Lorraine spent the day with them. I left after an hour, and did a bit more walking. Had the idea of sanding and varnishing the upstairs exterior window cills on the front of the house, but because of the way the windows were they were impossible to reach other than in patches. I had started one before I made this discovery (the windows open in a different way to the rear ones). So gave up, after varnishing the bits I had sanded. Lorraine not home till 8:30,...

Somewhat scuppered

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A phone call at 7am from Maureen, who was feeling unwell. Lorraine left immediately, to be with Pat while Maureen stayed in bed. This scuppered the get away to Dorset this afternoon to meet Innis and Rosie. Perhaps tomorrow. So I unexpectedly had the day to myself. Feeling annoyingly sluggish, with some cold symptoms. It rained lots which, though welcome, gave the day a dreary tinge. I spoke to Anton, who feels like he has a mountain to climb. Anne still in hospital and it does not seem that she'll be coming home anytime soon.  Checked in with Mum, who was going up the road to see her friend Gail. Also texted First Matie. Did a bit of creative work at my desk. Had a sleep. Bit of an in-between day. Fish and chips this evening. Lorraine not home till about twenty past eight. Then we watched Traitors and then went to bed. Look for the book you have already written. With this idea, I have been trawling through a stash of old bitmaps I'd mucked about with years ago, and have been l...

Sealife

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A normal Thursday, Lorraine zooming off to collect the baby boy. He was saying 'yeah' this morning to questions, along with his perennial favourite ca! said with a pointed finger, often when pointing at cars.  I went to life drawing this morning, and enjoyed it apart from the moment about half an hour in when I felt suddenly like I was going to throw up. I went outside for some air. This passed and apart from feeling a bit rattled, I continued. Lovely model called Carys. I always feel sad I can't draw better when she poses. Then I was picked up by Lorraine, with Enzo in the back, and we drove off to Brighton, where we went to the Sealife Centre which was great fun. Enzo liked seeing the fish and so on, although flinched once when we were in the tunnel underneath the big tank when a shark swam over us. While there we bumped into Jane and Ollie, who are Beth's bestie Laura's mum and dad. They were with little Layla and we sat by the big tank watching the turtles be fe...

Rules of Thumb

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A rainy day, with puddles. In this year of drought quite a sight. It felt cold too, with seasonally normal temperatures. Lorraine busy all day, off to rhyme time, and being with Pat and Maureen. Pat still unwell. Weary, perhaps from a minor bug, I spent the day indoors, and worked up a small idea from the little drawing below I did years ago, into a little paper zine, called Rules of Thumb. Below is rule one. Other than that did little. Spoke to Mum, and cooked a chicken stew, and enjoyed being at home.    

Communing with the sea

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Busy, despite feeling lethargic, but doing some stuff with zines, laundry and other tidying bits this morning. Heard from Anton, and Klaudia and Oskar have visited Anne in hospital.  Patrick unwell, with a chest infection. Lorraine sorting out a call with the doctor, and getting him antibiotics prescribed.  In the afternoon Lorraine and I drove off to Eastbourne, to a shop called the Aquarium and Reptile Centre, where Lorraine and I bought some plants for Maureen's aquarium. Lots of reptiles there, and some interesting tropical fish downstairs. The sound of chirruping crickets too, as there were boxes of them to take home to feed your reptiles with. I bought plants, and both Lorraine and I talked to the shy teenage boy who sat on a chair with a snake on his arm, like a large bracelet. I asked him if I could take his photo and he agreed. Lorraine went off to do her pottery course and I caught a 12 bus to Seaford, then collected Patrick's prescription and went around to Strathed...

Round trip to Edgware

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Back to the smoke today. Lorraine dropped us at the station, and we chugged along the coast, seeing low misty clouds between Seaford and Lewes. Changed at Brighton, the gaps between the train and the platform are huge if you are older. Then up to St Pancras and safely to Mill Hill. I was going to uber from there, but when I opened the app, the prices were utterly mad -- £40 for a ten minute trip. Instead we jumped on a bus, and changed buses at Edgware station and were home for free.  Wynford happened to be standing outside his house, as we arrived, and we were able to offer our condolences, for the loss of Barry, his dad, on Friday. Wynford seemed philosophical about it. The fact he had died peacefully in his nineties with no pain and at home, was a great comfort to him. I think Mum was pleased to be back in familiar circumstances. Had tea and biscuits and took her case upstairs and had a good chat, and after fond farewells,  I pushed off a little before three. Home by half s...

Sunday sunshine

Beth and Enzo around this morning, bringing sunshine with them. Mum enjoyed seeing Enzo and Beth. Beth on good form, and the baby impossibly cute, demonstrating his piano playing skills, and love of cars and trucks, but most of all being sung to by Beth and Lorraine and clapping along with the songs and doing little movements that go with them. Beth is so animated with him, he is full of delight at the world. Then we took Mum to see Pat and Maureen. Maureen very warm with Mum, and their sunny sea view was spectacular, with people sat about enjoying the unseasonal Sunday sun. She brought out a bag of plastic butterflies, and said she was thinking about sticking some of them to her wallpaper, which is a big woodland scene. Quite a novel way of thinking about it.  I popped into Morrisons on the way home, enjoying the walk. Mum and I just hung out in garden this afternoon, while Lorraine went off to the studio and did some pottery. Enjoyed chatting with her, while we sat outside, then ...

Idling by the sea with Mum

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After breakfast, Lorraine dropped Mum and I off at the seafront, while she did a supermarket shop. Mum and I went as far as the Martello, and sat on a bench looking at the boats and the crows and seagulls on the shore. It's good to stop and stare, and this was a lovely few minutes. I took the photo below of a crow leaping from a pole. Lorraine picked us up there, once home and unpacked, we simply sat in the garden and had cups of tea.  Steve came around, and told us about his trip to Erfurt in Germany with Dutch Mike, and about trips to the home of Bauhaus and other art. trips to nearby towns full of art and interesting things. He brought with him a jar of wild plum jam, and we sent him home with a bag of fresh tomatoes. Mum liked him and found him interesting. After Steve went, and we'd eaten lunch of smoked salmon sandwiches,  Toby called on Mum's iPad. He's busy at school, but he's off to California next weekend to see his nice pal Alex, who I've always thoug...

Mum in Seaford

Up to Edgware this morning. En route Anton called to say that he'd seen his valve specialist, and there is no doubt he needs the surgery, which now planning for. Later that day, he had to call an ambulance for Anne, who ended up in in A&E for coronary care. Extra stress is the last thing Anton needs. I felt bad that I can't do more to help. Lorraine busy with Pat and Maureen, and also going off to specialist glazing course this afternoon, but also having to arrange someone to be there to collect Pat this afternoon. Chris did it, kindly. Arriving at mum' a fairly quick turnaround. We jumped into an Uber to Mill Hill Broadway, and then trained it slowly, but mercifully smoothly, down to Seaford. Mum enjoyed seeing fields of animals, and lots of trees, and the chalk cliffs near Lewes which made her think of Folkestone. And we arrived home at about four. Cups of tea and saying hello to Lorraine. I'd nipped out at Brighton to buy a sandwich as we were hungry.  To the Boo...

Conversations

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Enzo here today, and the little chap with us for breakfast, playing with three new trucks.  I made off to life drawing. The model a man with SEX tattooed on his thigh. I mostly drew his feet, had a laugh with my life drawing pals though. Home rapidly, and Anton came around at lunchtime to talk to Lorraine and I about how he's going to manage the aftermath of his surgery, and take care of his mum, who is not well. He needed to talk, he has so much to manage when he really just needs to be taken care of himself.  Then I did the Understory Conversation. Charlotte mortified by a glitch in the contents page of some of the printed versions of Orange Cats. A horrid thing to happen to a writer.  As a reader I breezed past this and simply loved the poems. Linda delivered a fabulous four line poem that blew us away. A bit of a rushing about day. Below a snoozing Enzo.

Chaotic butterfly

Slow start for me, but like the chaos butterfly, me not getting up properly and making breakfast made Lorraine late. The bus arriving to collect Patrick was early, and she had to zoom around, but then she was unable to attach the headrest of the new wheelchair, needing an Allen key she did not have. So she had to take Patrick and Maureen to Eastbourne, and miss Rhymetime and felt stressed all day.   Far less stressful for me. I wrote a light substack post about being photographed . Otherwise boxes of who gives a crap loo rolls were delivered. I spoke briefly to Anton, and Sylvia was here. The Gym later, and then home for five, shower, call Mum and start dinner.  Had to down tools however,  to go with Lorraine to pick Patrick off the floor, as he got up as Maureen had been in the kitchen. He was completely unharmed thankfully. Home again, thank goodness its just five minutes away, and relaxed with a spot of Celebrity Masterchef.

Very lucky

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This morning writing responses to poets who said they were prepared to read my MS. Extremely flattered, and surprised with the warmth my requests were receive. I feel very lucky and touched.  Seemingly lots to do this morning, and early afternoon I went out for a walk, as I have got out of the habit during the endless hot weather. Am listening to Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy as I mooched along by the sea. Never read one of Le Carré's books before. Interesting mix of grubbiness and paranoia, along with the international espionage. It all feels very cramped and sweaty. Home feeling clammy and sweaty too, as it is very humid.  Beth dropped in with Enzo, who today crawled, with Lorraine's help, all the way up the stairs. Anton off for another procedure today, and meets his valve surgeon on Friday.  Then cooked and early dinner, so Lorraine could make off to her pottery class. I then spoke to Mum, went for another short walk, tidied up, and listened to Jazz and played about ...

Cringe action

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Up with the larks. Downstairs and out into the garden to  greet a fox, who was drinking from our little wildlife pond. I have suspicions about foxes wanting to move in, having seen one or two over the weekend. Lorraine said Mum would like it.   Lorraine off for a personal training session, not usually on a Monday, then to see Maureen. Meanwhile Chris arrived two hours early to do a boiler service, and swap lots of friendly chat.   Once he'd left, I finally overcame the cringe, after Lorraine told me to just get on with it, and set out some emails asking people to look at my MS and, hopefully, supply endorsing quotes about the book for the cover.   Then, the cringe wearing off a little I slipped off to the gym, where I trundled about a bit.  Then home to think about Zines for a bit, and chat to Mum. Lorraine and I ate a block of random frozen stuff from the freezer, which thawed into an unlovely soup.  Below incredibly vivid skies in the evening, including ...

Happy Sunday

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A happy day, Lorraine and I spending time together in the studio, living the bourgeoise dream, Lorraine quietly doing pottery, me drawing a zine about someone murdering a cat.  Also we had the baby boy for a couple of hours this morning. He was his normal cheery self, until after Lorraine had spooned him a food pouch of various veggies and he was sick. We were in the living room, so Lorraine soothed him while I cleaned up the sofa, carpet and Lorraine, who had to change. Poor little lad. However my trusty gold sofa is covered in such miraculous material that it cleaned up effortlessly. Ate more of a particularly delicious chilli I had cooked yesterday for supper, and quiet night. To bed, once I'd dealt with a Shelob of a spider on the bedroom ceiling that Lorraine hadn't even noticed. Looked again -- more cringing -- at the photos Innis took of me. Decided that I needed to use them. Here's one of me smiling by the sea, which is perhaps a bit too cheery perhaps to use as an ...

Fox on the run

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We heard Delores spent part of her day outside her house sharing chocolates with passers-by.  After my French holiday, and a week of socialising, I am edging into Jabba the Hut territory , despite going to the gym. Swerving beer for a week seems a quick win. Maybe it's my age, but I really like waking up feeling crystal clear. After my birthday's done in October, I'm toying with a pre-Christmas interlude of booze austerity.    A fox or two sunning themselves on our lawn this morning. I went out to say hello. One hung about and looked at me fairly calmly, before springing over the fence. It's all very spidery at the moment. I got several spiderwebs in my hair in the garden and the glasshouse, and found it is also full of big brown moths. Lorraine and I had seen the chrysalises earlier and wondered what they were. We went into Seaford and looked at fabric. Lorraine took me into two shops where we looked at 'fat quarters' and other material. Lorraine knows how to b...