New Year's eve. Slept in for hours, and then twinged my back painfully taking a shower. This must be a new tradition as I did almost exactly the same thing at the same time last year. This put a brake on doing much. Had a laugh sitting around chatting to Mum and Mase. And Mum pursaded me to let her try her healing powers on my back. Eventually I succumbed. We watched The Ring DVD together which I thought was quite stylish and scary, but I seem to be a bit hardened to horror films these days. The Ring 2 was the first film I'd saw with MJ. MJ called me on the moment of the new year. She was at Weezer's place after a scary drive there in the snow and sleet. 2005 was a lively year all right!
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Awake at 5:30 and MJ , pre-coffee, drove me to JFK airport for seven. She took a lot of the stress out of things by getting me there and keeping me calm before the flight. Horrible to say goodbye. I hate saying goodbye to her. Flight not too foul. Ended up with a window seat towards the tail, having been moved to accommodate a family. Sat next to two utterly taciturn women. They might as well have been ghosts. Some turbulence but managed to doze for a while. Nothing to watch onboard that I'd not already seen. We were flying east and I was interested to see the thicken indigo smudge on the horizon, which was darkness coming to meet the plane. London looked lovely and we spent almost half an hour circling it to get a good view. Running late I got a cab and managed to get home to Mum and Mason's house by 11 pm and so was able to glug a couple of glasses of wine, and eat banana cake with them to celebrate Mum's birthday.
Off to see The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe, quite faithful to the book. MJ and the kids really liked it too. Unlike the book, the film opened with German bombers blitzing London, and the children being evacuated. I have been surprised at the sometimes vitriolic criticism in the UK press about the film because of its Christian overtones. This is an absurd basis for criticism. Is Dante's Divine Comedy usless, because it is overtly Christian? Nonsense. Told Jack that Mum had been in London during the blitz, which he was interested to hear. After dropping the children off at their father's, MJ and I enjoyed a Thai meal. Then some shopping, where I bought her and Anne flowers, and a bargain case to replace the one that had fallen apart on the way to Baltimore. Then I had to pack. Having done this felt quite sad, and spent the remainder of the evening drinking red wine and chatting with MJ.
Busy day getting practical stuff sorted out. Kids squabbling in the car. Had lunch in the incredibly busy restaurant in Walt Whitman mall. Enjoyable evening -- got MJ to read American poetry to me in her American Lady's voice. Jack sitting nearby playing Runescape on the computer and half listening in. Discussing the greatness of Sylvia Plath and the mysteriously good reputation of Robert Creeley. I was underwhelmed by him once in Leamington Spa when I was a student, in an audience swollen by sycophantic lecturers from my University. Talking about poetry made us both want to get down to writing again. Also I have never read much of Emily Dickinson, and she read me a couple of her favourites that I really liked, like this one, which is one of her favourites: There's a certain slant of light Of winter afternoons That oppresses, like the heft Of cathedral tunes. Heavenly hurt it gives us We can find no scar, But internal difference Where meanings are None may teach it anything
A beautiful blue sky, and us off into Manhattan. We took the train to Penn Station. The conductor on the train said hello baby to me, by way of asking for my ticket which I rather liked. Disappointingly MJ refused to become jealous. Walked to a subway station which took us to Central Park Zoo, to look at seals, penguins, polar bears, snakes, tropical birds and so on. Liked the strange juxtapositions... Snow monkeys sitting on a rock surrounded by water, with the big buildings of New York City behind. I like central park. Kids really enjoyed the zoo. Went to the zoo cafe afterwards, though Jack went on a brief hungerstrike. Then caught a bus down 5th Avenue to the West Village. 5th Avenue beautifully decorated for Christmas, and we glimpsed the big Christmas Tree outside Rockerfeller Center. Then a walk around MJ's old Manhattan haunts till we went to The White Horse, a very pub-like bar, frequented by Dylan Thomas -- and MJ Tenerelli. Here we ate nice burgers, Jack overcoming his
Boxing day. Having no servants to give boxes of food and gifts to MJ and me made our own amusement. Had a nice feed in the Greek diner... both of us have overdosed on the Hokey Pokey now. I had a Greek salad, which threw in half the Gross National Product of Greece. We decided to go to the movies, to see a comedy called The Family Stone . Although a bit stupid and very manipulative I think we were both enjoying it, although in some of the touching Christmassy bits, there was some sniffing from the audience. Unfortunately the mother character played by Diane Keaton dies in the movie. This made MJ very sad and glisteny eyed afterwards because she misses her mom. So if you are looking to be cheered by a movie, this may not be the one.
Christmas day for me and MJ with a first cup of coffee at 6:00 am. Soon a bleary-eyed Jack and Kate tore happily into their presents under the Christmas tree. Fun to watch, and as far as I could tell they seemed very content with their Christmas haul. Called Mum and Mase, and also spoke to Anton and Weezer during the day and Johanna Pie finally got through to MJ. MJ gave me an excellent book of Neruda poetry and watercolour pictures. While the perceptive Pies gave me an admirable teeshirt decorated with a chick and a magnet . Very mellow and enjoyable day after the children had been collected by their father. MJ and me had bagels with Mike and Anne, and took the opportunity to go back to bed to catch up on some much needed sleep. In the afternoon off to Lia's house in nearby East Northport. Driving along with MJ I experienced, for the 400th time, the odd contradiction of how normal it feels for me and MJ to be spending Christmas together, and how odd it is that I find myself in Lon
Much of the morning spent wrapping presents. Loved the name of one of Jack's: Mount Doom Gift Set . Then off to Wendys for a quick burger-based feed. Set off in the afternoon to see Weezer and Troy. Nice drive west into the setting sun till we got into Brooklyn and the traffic dragged. Spoke to Weezer from a traffic jam and worried her by saying we'd got her another cat. Once there we were joined by Kathy Velmar and Keith and their son Mark. Also a neighbour called Rich. Took the opportunity to re-photo Troy too, against his backdrop of paintings. Became acquainted with Neptune, Weezer's new dog. Got into a horrid loop where it kept dropping its drooly pig's ear on me, which I would fling away in disgust, only to have it continually returned. Troy put a muzzle on it at one point, which with its glittering sinister eyes made it look like Hannibal Lecter. Weezer cooked a most excellent beef Wellington with meltingly good beef. We watched Charlie Brown on TV and generally
Not much to report today. Feeling very happy to be with MJ again, and had good fun sloping about the place. We sloped off to the Walt Whitman Mall, for example, where MJ chose some nice boots in Macy's as a bit of a Christmas present. Kate off with a sore throat today, but she was largely recovered by the time we had collected Jack from school, brandishing a gingerbread house that he'd made at school. Out locally for pizza slices and ice cream. Was forced to run from the pizza place to the ice cream place as I was challenged to a race by the children. Luckily I won. Being generally delighted with how I am getting on with the children. As far as Kate is concerned I have successfully recovered from the mysterious invisibility I was afflicted with a few visits ago, and she and Jack both chat and play happily with me now.
Getting some practical stuff sorted today -- then more shopping. Spoke to Toby this morning, who is getting ready to shoot down to the sunshine of Cuba on Saturday. Sounds like it's exactly what's needed for him and Romy. Since I have been on the plane I have become strangely charged. I have received half a dozen strong electric shocks a day. Returned to Toys R Us. Found myself in a queue containing children and yelping bastard! as I received yet another painful zap from a gameboy. Somewhat embarrassing, especially for MJ who is forced to accompany a delegate from the British Tourettes Association. Also hunting Tamagotchi for Kate. MJ managed to bag one, despite being told there were none to be had. No idea what they are, but I know one thing: they are elusive. Collected bairns from school and we made off to Commack Multiplex to see King Kong. We all enjoyed it. I'd never seen anything like the wonderful brontosaurus stampede scene before & the best giant ape versus T.
Off to a chilly but picturesque Northport. Another day, another diner: ate a hot bowl of porridge, and then lots more knife and forkwork. MJ ordering a steak for breakfast, something I have never seen in the UK. After this we drifted happily around the Northport shops, including MJ's favourite new age store, where she becomes very happy, sniffing the aromatherapised air and browsing thoughtfully around the divination tools and special stones. Noticed that in the concrete of the pavement nearby someone had written Jesus is God and Jesus is the true Lord , probably to counteract the sinister new age forces nearby. I'm just loving being with MJ again. The simplest things are great fun. Went to the Stop and Shop supermarket, and enjoyed messing with her Virgo head by forbidding her to push the shopping cart. Later, collected the bairns, car chock-full of shopping. Jack had a book of disgusting jokes about snot and poop which he happily shared on the drive home. Then more games. He
Happy today, but zombie tired. Off with my MJ to the Hokey Pokey for a cheeseburger breakfast, lots off coffee and making plans. Then off to toys r us to investigate presents for the bairns. Then collected the children from school. Home and a couple of hours of playing a video game with Jack. We were lying on the floor piloting Star Wars racer things, and little Genny stood on me and used me as climbing frame until we embarked on various shrieky monster games with Kate and 4 year old Jenny joining in. More diva wars with Kate being Queen of the Mermaids and Genny being Queen of the Dolphins. It transpired that the Queen of the Mermaids had suspicions about the Queen of the Dolphins, and accused her of stealing gameboys. Falsely as it happened as I found it under a chair. Decided to eat out at a little Italian place we'd been to before in Comack. Big food, and as far as the kids were concerned it was an excellent choice being near the big pet store. Spent some time there looking at
Finally in Long Island with my MJ. I was woken up in Baltimore, city of crabs, by Mad Dog. I'd been asleep for ten hours. Nice to talk to Bob, and made me feel like I wasn't so far from home. Had been dreaming about my Grandmother for the third time this week. Perhaps she is trying to tell me something. Went downstairs to the bar/breakfast room with 56 (I asked) televisions in it. I was the only guest there to begin with and it was quite surreal having all these giant screens tuned to three different stations. After my "all American" breakfast, worked in my room getting my ducks in a row, and struggling with housekeeping to get my complimentary tea and coffee for the room. Very odd woman in the hotel giftshop -- astonishingly rude, and trembling with rage when I asked her if they did the pink crab t-shirt in children's sizes. It was clean but otherwise a fairly badly run hotel, but it was almost opposite the meeting place. Met the Creative Director from Californi
Off we go to the States again. Up to Victoria where I popped into the drop in medical centre to get some more antibiotics -- and blagged some emergency anti hysteria pills for the flight. Absolutely no queue and walked straight into see the doctor. Then off to Heathrow, arrived in plenty of time. Got a window seat with legroom too near the wing, which was a distinct improvement. Flight not too bad. No drugs or drink needed. Boredom allowed to leak through the usual existential angst . Watched a stupid film about a 40-year old virgin which nevertheless made me laugh. Find that on planes the only thing I can tolerate is comedies -- and nothing with fiery explosions please. Got chatting to the Spanish stewardess who sat opposite me on landing, I told her about the extraordinary circumstances surrounding my trip and she told me about the delights of Madrid. One of my cases trashed en route. Baltimore airport seemed to be deserted. Nobody at the single information desk. No taxi to be had.
Sprang from bed at 9:00pm and had breakfast with Mum and Mase. Mase on loquatious form before even sipping his coffee. A parcel arrived from Toby and Romy containing, among other things, balls of wool for Mum to make her patented free-standing socks. Mum and Mase gave me some presents for Jack, Kate and MJ and I had to shoot off back to Brighton. When I reached Brighton, I spoke to my MJ who was phoning from Weezer's place. We are very excited about seeing each other next week. Meanwhile Neptune, who it transpires is not a New Orleans dog but a rescue dog from Brooklyn, yipped in the background and Weezer talked to it lovingly. Popped up the road to see Anna and Anton and Baby Klauds. Klauds walking about and looking quite grown up with her hair in bunches. Anna gave me some chocolates for Jack and Kate and Klauds looked momentarily traumatised by this, repeating Peter, nock nock , which means Peter Chocolate. Home again and faffing about getting ready, and wishing I could fast for
Somewhat slow in the head after the office Christmas party last night. Played myself the brainwashing positive thinking tape on the train, and picked up the passport of a surly-looking criminal at Victoria. At work raced the clock all day long. Mystifyingly, there was still more fighty stuff. And for comedy value people were disassembling furniture and desks and IT around me and the Gnome as we worked -- for they are moving the creative department yet again. This time we will have an excellent view of the river. Left work at 8pm with what I feel are three excellent scripts and concept boards. I won't feel like I have my trousers around my ankles and a comedy nose as I present on Monday. Spoke to the French Bloke today, sounding excellent. He said admiringly that Bouncy Max was as hard as nails -- sipping at a little gas and air before popping out the bairn, who is being referred to as Fi, as in Female Infant. Then to see Mum and Mason. Tube trains snailed frustratingly. Finally mad
At lunchtime to the passport office in Victoria, and was duly processed. Hate those official places and felt concerned that if I'd not completed the form properly, then the trip to the US would be in trouble. As I handed my old passport over, I overheard this from the next booth. Passport man: How did you come to this country? Applicant: I have been in this country six years. Passport man: No...HOW? ..... HOW? By airplane? By boat? By lorry? Applicant: Yes, lorry. Back to work & more mad slogging culminating in the Gnome and me having a long teleconference with the Creative Director in California who seemed very nice. Meanwhile the agency was making merry at the Christmas Party. I decided to show my face and make an early exit. Four hours of talking everyone's head off, and having mine talked off (say one thing for agency types, they like to talk) I arrived home in Brighton at about 12:30. I conceived the idea that fish and chips were to be eaten. There no food to speak o
Ah. 11:00pm and a glass of wine. Heroically late to work. Having missed the morning train I went into a passport photobooth. Pumped coins into the swine but 20p pieces arbitrarily didn't count as money and were simply swallowed. Now have four identical tooth-grinding Peter Kenny faces. One of which will grace my passport for ten years. Funny how that happens. My last passport always made me look like a Bulgarian dissident. Slunk into work to discover that, overnight, the most excellent Gnome had conceived an idea for the Baltimore job. Perhaps at last he is adapting to life on the surface. This took some of the pressure off me as now we have three good ideas. Spent the rest of the day slogging against the clock on scripts and treatments. Breaking off only to e-moan with Kate, and e-mail my MJ. Random tetchiness in the office today, and this afternoon Mandy flew into a poisonous rage with me about upsetting her forward planning as I forgot to tell her I wouldn't be working on th
Sluggish start to the day, almost impossible to drag myself from bed. The train left Brighton in low winter sunlight and headed towards a big bank of dark cloud that made me wonder for a moment if the noxious fumes over Southern England had drifted this far south. A team at work produced a concept using the cloud for one of our clients. With any luck, and if the client buys it, it will be quite a hard hitting press advert in the next day or so. My working day was conducted in a daze, and thinking about the third world aids crisis, poverty, war etc for the Baltimore visit. This did not prevent me from breaking off in my pampered office to moan weakly but persitently. The Gnome, however, helped me prioritise and I grew more bearable as the day wore on. Arranged to renew my passport urgently on Thursday. E-moaned to Kate and MJ. Home, yet another Chinese takeaway. No more for a while. And then popped up the hill to pick up a passport application form from the useful and somewhat recovered
Had an appointment at the local hospital for some minor tests today, and so worked from home. Walked back along by the sea, and on a whim enjoyed a pizza and salad buffet for lunch. Spoke to mum who said that yesterday's big explosion sounded like someone breaking in the back door. She said that Tanya and Robert had been thrown from bed. Also talked to Anna who is a little better, but Anton not. Messaging MJ who said that Johanna had used the word haruspex , which I'd never heard before. According to the Wikipedia is A haruspex was a sort of Roman augur in who practiced divination by inspecting entrails of sacrificed animals, especially the livers of sacrificed sheep. Baarbaric I call it. Was sent booking confirmation for my direct flight to Baltimore on Sunday. It will be an adventure. So will trying to get my passport and work sorted out in time. Yikes.
Baby Klauds has given Anton and Anna a spewing virus. They were craving fizzy drinks so I took them up some and let myself into their house. Quite sweet seeing them all in a line in bed, made me think of the "three in the bed, and the little one said, roll over, roll over "... song. Quiet, gusto-free day today spent contemplating the enormous amount of organising I have to do in the next week. And somewhere along the line I have to come up with some ideas to take to the US or else the deal is off. Spoke to MJ and Weezer again this morning. They are funny girls. In Brighton we missed the huge pall of smoke that was visible from space from the explosion at Hemel Hempstead just north of London. Apparently the explosion at some sort of massive oil depot was the largest peacetime explosion in Europe, and was heard over 100 miles away. Below is an apocalyptic image I just stole from the BBC website. Just noticed that First Matie says in her blog that the London sky today was full o
Needed a slow quiet day. And had it. Popped out briefly to buy a cheap microphone for my computer, and passed 20 Santas walking down Queen Street, with some URL or other on their backs. Gallingly I didn't have a camera with me, as it would have made an excellent photo. Found that I could drop the microphone into Bianca, my white steel stringed semi acoustic guitar, and after downloading some music editing software I happily played with set up, recording bits and pieces for several hours. Found that the software could reverse the sound and this sometimes was really interesting in an old-school Beatles-ish way. Boys toys. Spoke to MJ and Weezer. Much talk about Neptune which MJ saw for the first time with her extraordinary and powerful eyes. Arf. No Netpune is Weezer's rescue dog from New Orleans. And it is apparently incredibly intelligent so it is probably worrying about something like global warming as it slavers over its pigs ear in the morning. Anna and Anton wanted to go ou
Nice day today. Had the morning off supposedly for Xmas shopping. Used this time to sack my plumber. The worst thing about sacking the plumber is that you can only do it once. I wanted to sack him over and over for about half an hour. Anyway now I need another plumber to sort out my wretched plumbing. However at least this is better than being strung along, lied to, and being forced to listen to pipe dreams. MJ's spy Anton has failed again as I went to Nicki in Chiswick who cut my hairs in the approved manner. And talking of Anton... he called me today to say he had just received notification that he had passed his MA. He was understandably pleased about this and it is a good reward for the literally hours of work he put into it. Back in the office this afternoon, and had to step in to be pitched to by two lots of graduate employees -- bright young things, and then give them feedback. Amazingly professional and they took the exercise incredibly seriously. All quite diverting, and t
Bouncy Max and the French Bloke and had a baby girl this afternoon, weighing in at 7 lbs 8 oz. The baby was at least two weeks overdue. Spoke to the FB briefly this evening and he was sounding very cheery, saying that Max and the baby were fine. Work quite quiet today. The Gnome away at a shoot and me fractiously dealing with pesky bits of boring stuff. Felt rather twitchy for some reason but went for a lunch with Trace in the cheap Thai place. She was on excellent form and she nicely reframed things for me. She had the best definition of stress I'd ever heard: responsibility without control. We had a long talk ranging from the CS Lewis books from a pyschological and postcolonial standpoints, and her time living in Colorado. Afternoon... more pesky bits. Then went for a swim, happily finding the trunks -- untouched by human hand -- that I'd left there yesterday. Then went on to meet Shaila for a tasty vegetarian meal at the Gate as it was her birthday two days ago. She is off t
Text from the FB this morning: still at home progressing slowly but steadily. Max still full of pep apparently. Out of the blue, the possibility of me being flown to the US for a work thing. Trying not to get too excited as yet because there is many a slip twixt cup and lip -- but it could mean a business trip to the US just before xmas. A rather subdued Creative Department this morning, after yesterday's excesses. The Gnome and me quietly going about our work. Quite happy that I'd left at a reasonable early the night before, otherwise I would have felt as shabby as some of the more enthusiastic creatives appeared to be. Stole away from work slightly early to go for another swim. Felt very tired beforehand but it perked me up somewhat. From there walked off to the Thatched House for a feed and drink with Matty boy, Katie, Paul, and Bryony who I'd not seen for ages. Young Bryony is now doing very well working in film production, having once been Kate's art director. The
First Matie just called to say bouncy Max is in labour now -- she is at least two weeks late. Otherwise... This afternoon a creative dept xmas meal and drink up. Went to an Indian restaurant on King Street, Hammersmith called Agni which was okay. Crammed into a long thin room upstairs on a long table. Smitten with tiredness, I closed my eyes for a split second which attracted the attention of half the creatives on the other end of the table who all laughed at me. Bastards. Went to a couple of pubs afterwards, and drank beers in the approved manner. Lots of chatting with people I don't normally talk to too much. Nick told me of a court case where he was charged under terrorist legislation having sent, as a student, a mailpack to a leading magazine. The concept was that it was a bomb. He was arrested and, traumatisingly, it went to trial. He was also suprisingly interesting talking about Napoleon too. Escaped fairly early, ate a Chinese takeaway and watched some football on TV then..
Monday. Reading an admirably clear chunk of The Second Sex by Simone de Beauvoir on the train this morning in my modern continental philosophy reader.At work and nothing going on for me and the Gnome but tumbleweed and crows. However had my earphones plugged into my computer listening to the wonderful Pandora , which allows you to create your perfect radio music station. It’s fab. Ally B wrote to me again today. Her excellent blog is called wordhead , which is about life in Dubai and other musings, and is well worth a visit. Another swim today. Felt virtuous if a little bit bored, but I am nauseatingly fat again. When I got home tonight I went out for a walk for getting on for two hours, as I was feeling restless. Nice being down by the sea, saw some very distant lightning towards France. The Gnome called me up when I was down there to say he won’t be in as there has been some more difficult news about his son. It just goes on and on. Mary Jane sent me this picture today which she’d lo
Bright and cheery afternoon in Brighton. After speaking to MJ, who was having her morning coffee with her pal Kadabra in snowy Brooklyn, I went out with Anton and Baby Klauds for a few hours. We lurked in the lanes and then walked down to the sea in bright low sunlight. Baby Klauds in a very grumpy mood, and when she woke up and discovered we were in the Tin Drum at the end of the afternoon, she made her feelings felt and we went back to Anton's place to watch Pingu together for a few minutes. Pingu is a lively gibberish-spouting penguin who seems to transfix Klaudia. After some of this, I left Anton and Klauds to it, and loafed happily at home this evening. Watched a programme on BBC called the Story of God, a sort of comparative religion series of documenties which was absorbing. Got an email from former colleague and AnotherSun contributor Ali B today in Dubai who stumbled across this blog. Suddenly able to use my digital camera again. Two down by the sea, and the other of a de
Ambushed by a random gloom today. Used this inertia to do laundry etc. Fortunately gloom was dissipated this evening by Ken's 75 birthday party. I enjoyed Ken's party. With Ken obviously enjoying having lots of family and friends around him. After a lovely spread of grub, and quite a bit of wine it came to the time to sing Ken Happy birthday. Quite a bit of wine being drunk, and his son had made an excellent cake which was decorated with French Sparklers (which sounded to me like something you'd find in an Anne Summers catalogue). We sang happy birthday to Ken with the sparklers setting off the fire alarm. Enjoyed chatting to Janet and Ken and their guests. I tuned into a few bizarre conversations going on round and about including Simon, Ken's son in law, breaking a long and rather wine-soaked silence to announce that next year "my age will be the reverse of my wife". His wife is Ken's daughter Rachel. Turns out that next year he will be 73, and his wife
Strange night in which I slept lightly, a gale causing lots of unfamiliar noises. Fumbling with my mobile phone which I use as an alarm clock, I managed to accidentally call Anton twice at 7. Today, was a day of birthdays... Anna, the French Bloke and Reuben. And Ken's birthday party tomorrow. Spoke to the FB who was in a pub in Soho with Max. Emailed Reuben. And saw Anna this evening. These clusters seem statistically unlikely. Like my September cluster of Anton and Maddog on the 2nd, and Simon and MJ on the 4th. Reading the work of Karl Jaspers (1883-1969) on the train. Never read any of his philosophy before, but it seemed quite slight (on this skim through) compared to the mighty Heidegger. The excerpt I read this morning was reminding existentialism of the validity of science, which I am sure is very important philosophically etc. but not terribly interesting to me. Rushed into work in time for a meeting which did not occur. Did work hastily this morning and then again after
An email from Weezer saying that her nice dog Louie (whose picture has previously featured on this site) had died. Weezer and Troy are naturally very sad about it. And he was much loved by them. I enjoyed seeing him only the other week wearing small socks, which Weezer had made him wear to stop him falling over. Dozing fitfully on the train, and once at work there were mysteriously sudden & urgent deadlines to meet. So most of the day spent slogging. Turns out most people who went to the flashy Bluebird restaurant last night had upset stomachs except for me. After work I travelled to Portsmouth for Jane and Christian's leaving for Australia party. Met a few ex-colleagues I'd not spoken to for over five years which was quite fun. Anton then drove us back to Brighton. He finally got closure on his recent musical huffiness by blasting Jean-Jacques Burnell's wretched Euroman Cometh on the CD player of his car as we aqua-planed Brighton-wards in heavy rain. Picked up a blea
Heidegger again on the train. Finished the Being and Time excerpts. It is all so gapingly profound and impenetrable at the same time. I like the feeling of reading something really big and clever that is forever out of reach for me. I love the language sometimes too... Like this: "Time needs to be explicated primordially as the horizon for the understanding of Being". Not much work to do today. Went for a swim at lunchtime, which I enjoyed. Called MJ walking back. I am missing her very badly this time. In the evening went out with work people, including Pat, Andy and the French Bloke, and some pleasant clients to a place called the Bluebird Restaurant on the Kings Road. Quite swanky and the food good. Had lots of wine and chatted. Left at 9:30 and made it home at 11. Slept on the train. Called my baby and then slurred off to bed.
Listened to my brainwashing tape on the train this morning, which I'd not done for a while. Makes me feel very positive. Must be in some kind of strange cycle, with contact from university friends and so on lately, and a thirst for reading philosophy again. It was The Continental Philosophy Reader this morning. Found myself reading excerpts from Heidegger's Being and Time . Heidegger has always fascinated me, but makes my head want to explode. It is far easier to read books about Heidegger than read Heidegger himself. But reading it slowly again this morning and again on the way home I found it a mite easier going than I remembered. Being and Time asks an incredibly simple question in a very complicated way: what is the meaning of being. In the introduction he says... "Every inquiry is a kind of seeking... Inquiry, as a kind of seeking, must be guided beforehand by what is sought. So the meaning of Being must already be available to us in some way." He is saying tha
Travelled into work from Edgware. Mason up early making coffee and toast for me, which was very nice. Despite this, quite Mondayish by the time I arrived at Hammersmith, but was cheered by a lovely message from MJ at work. Had to get hacking fairly swiftly, but made time to send that nice Weezer a birthday e-card. Otherwise little happened today other than doing bits of work. Went out for a chilly half-an-hour stroll by the river, calling MJ as I turned back towards the office. The French bloke sent me this today: “This is a strange poem. I was doing some research and was reminded of a rare event called a "stone baby". It happens when the foetus (usually at a late stage) dies. In rare cases, instead of expelling it, the body converts it to calcium carbonate - in effect limestone. It is almost unknown today in the western world, in fact there are only three hundred reports ever, anywhere. Interesting that this lady chose to use a poem to resolve the loss. I don't know if i
A late thanksgiving meal with Mum and Mason. Snapped this photo as an artistic symbol of the deadly menace mankind poses to the turkey. Mason actually cooked a goose. I can't remember the last time I ate goose, but this one was tasty and a little bit gamey. There were plenty of giblets which went unused, including a long string of neckbones which I had a quick gander at. Had a nice day relaxing day however, talking to them and to Robert and Tanya, and Diane who turned up later, and was discussing a possible move to Brighton. Mum's evil back had struck the day before and she was hobbling a bit, but she self-medicated with muscle relaxant pills and gin. Helped her in the final stages of making a pumpkin pie. Loads of food and so on. In between all the festivities I carried on reading my Robert Frost poems, and spoke to Toby, who was marking books on a Sunday afternoon, which sounds a pain. Spoke to MJ twice. I am really missing her. She was a bit traumatised, however, to learn th
Woken by Ken this morning phoning to double check that I will be attending his 75th birthday party next Saturday. Scrambling downstairs to the phone I realised I had overslept due to a traumatised body clock. He sounded in fine form, and was saying their place in Aix was now ready, and that he had been working on the satisfying business of writing a biographical note for an academic translation he has been working on. Looking forward to seeing him next week. Otherwise feeling sluggish today. Went for a short walk down to the sea via the Pavilion. I was wearing my beany hat which gives me a large and pear-shaped head. I have a wrong face for hats unless they have large brims. Cold here, although in Brighton there is no snowfall as there has been in other parts of the country. Then off to London to see Mum and Mase. Long journey due to repair work on the tracks. I didn't feel like writing today, however, and the battery on my ipod shuffle ran out so I brooded on things in a Heathclif
Overslept this morning... Cold when I woke up. Off to work, reading more about Robert Frost. Apparently he came to England to cultivate Edward Thomas before the first world war. Thomas is in my opinion the best minor poet in English in the twentieth century. Frost is very enjoyable however. Otherwise work inoffensive and me feeling a bit dull. Nothing much on. Went to the pub at lunchtime for an hour with Marilyn, Mike, Debs and Mandy. Lurked in the work bar before slinking off to meet Paul who was haunting Hammersmith with a small aquarium. Then headed homeward and slept happily on the train, arriving in Brighton in good enough time to score myself a nice Chinese meal. Spoke to Mum and I will slip up to Edgware at the weekend. Chatted to Sophie too.
Back to work. Managed to get up on time and so on. Work was okay but jetlag made me feel very disconnected from things. Quite nice to see the Gnome, and had a quick chat with the French Bloke. Apparently Max is due to drop at any moment. She is finally off work but apparently went for a bicycle ride this morning. Email from First Matie and will hook up with her next week. Spoke to Shaila too, who is back in Blighty. Otherwise not an arduous day, thank God. Cold though! Home and spoke to MJ who is forking into turkeys in Brooklyn for thanksgiving with Weezer and Troy. I am a bit braindead but reading Robert Frost on the train. Lots of images in the poems about leaves, which having seen a little of New England is hardly surprising. Enjoying one particularly this morning called A Leaf-Treader . I like the opening... I have been treading on leaves all day until I am autumn-tired. God knows all the color and form of leaves I have trodden on and mired. Perhpas I have put forth too much stren
Landed in thick fog at Heathrow. Amazing how, with no visibility, the pilot can land a 747-400 the size of a skyscraper, so gently. As we touched down it was so foggy that we still seemed to be in cloud. Lots of tiresome lurking in the airport, decided I needed to do something about my new case which is identical to everyone-else's case. Then Zombied home from Heathrow to Brighton. I don't know what these people have been doing here. It is bloody freezing. Anton told me that it had been down to minus 7 in the last week. Home and bought some chewy brown bread ate, then slept for a couple of hours on the sofa. Caught up with Mum on the phone and lurked about for a bit. In the evening went out to the Tin Drum with Anton. Collecting him, had a quick chat with Anna who will be on TV yet again having been interviewed on the train about people using computers in the carriages. Anton on good form and looking unnaturally healthy. He's off to Madrid tomorrow. Missing MJ. Had a couple
Boo. The day of leaving. Pathetic fallacy kicked in and it was stormy and raining hard. Gloomily looking at the weather map. Storms all along the eastern seaboard boded ill for the flight. MJ and me however made good use of our last day. Went to the Hokey Pokey again... but this time armed with paper and pens and made mind maps and ate large food and drank coffee and had important, top-level discussions. Then home to make phone calls and so on and make the most of MJ's wonderful company. Later went back to the Chinese retaurant next to the railway station, for mountains of noodles and ribs. Then I caught the train and headed back to Jamaica station, after saying wretched goodbyes to MJ. Leaving her offends the gods as I have said before. Made it to the airport fairly easily and early. Lurked about feeling glum and failing to find something in the bookshop. Phoned MJ who had been crying. Went to the bar there and drank a solitary beer before boarding the plane. Amusing dialogue with
Walt Whitman twice today. Was reading his poems, which suddenly make much more sense to me having seen New England. Found myself really enjoying them. Then later to the Walt Whitman mall with MJ who was on an unsuccessful shoe hunt. Feeling somewhat sad that it was my last full day. Collected Jack and Kate from school and did some more shopping and ate some pizza. In the evening we rented a film from Blockbusters about mutant ants attacking people, and we all watched this together. Before the film started Jack became a fantastically good monster. He was lurking under the bed and doing zombie eyes and speaking in demonic voices and making everyone scream by trying to drag people into his lair. Anne and Mike have been very kind and hospitable to me, and I had a nice chat with Mike, who had come to collect Genny before the scary film came on. Genny wasn't very impressed with not being able to watch the movie though. After the film had a long conversation with Kate who gave me a corn
A morning, so there must be a diner. Denny's next to the motel I’m told is something of an American institution. Did it justice by eating a large breakfast, but later was slightly regretful that I didn’t eat a dish on offer called Eggs over My Hammy . Then into Salem. Went to the Witch Dungeon Museum and The Witch History Museum . In the dungeon museum there was a re-enactment of some of the trial by two actresses on stage, and then we shuffled downstairs into a recreation of the dungeons that the witches were stored in for safekeeping. These dungeons were full of dodgy looking waxworks, but it gave you an idea of scale -- especially the very small cuboardy spaces for witches to be tidied into. Thence to the Witch History Museum, passing a statue of Elizabeth Montgomery, the actress who played Samantha in ancient TV show Betwitched . Amusing tale of the statue's recent unveiling here . The museum was another enjoyable waxwork tour with much the same story of the bizarre accus
Off to Salem! Breakfast of home-made waffles with Mike and Anne. Mike then drove us to the care hire place where we got a gold car, he amusingly offered us a crucifix for protection. I enjoyed the drive into Brooklyn, and made me feel like we were in the The French Connection . Picked up Weezer and Troy who were armed with an interesting assortment of CDs, including some Bluegrass music played by people with eight or twelve fingers per hand. Lots of tunes in the car, and was taught by demonstration how to yee-haw! by my travel companions. New England beautiful -- I loved all the trees and the wide open spaces, and imagining what life would be like in the small and pretty towns we drove through. "Fall" more advanced here than in Long Island and the whole country seemed to be covered in leaves, and people busily engaged in apparently futile attempts to clear their lawns. Noticing again for the nth time how many flags there are in the US. Stars and stripes everywhere. Pride an
MJ and me into our suits and off to the family court this morning. Sat about for three hours waiting for the case to be called, and eventually it was postponed due to a legal technicality. Very Dantesque, with people discussing their cases with a sleaze of lawyers. Edward Hopper scenes of people sitting alone but preoccupied in the strangely featureless corridors with big squares of bright light from the sun through windows. MJ tuning into all the misery about the place. Gave her some paper to draw evil clown pictures as a distraction, and we spoke to Johanna and Michael. After discussions with her lawyer we were released from this and drove through the resplendent trees of long Island back to the Hokey Pokey again (the other places being closed) for lunch, and a much needed glass of wine. Collected the Kate from school and went to the Sweet Shop in Northport. Kate doing her extraordinary "raptor" hiss, which I copied in the car and painfully clicked my jaw. Back to school to
After the children went off to school, MJ and I went to the nearby Hokey-Pokey diner to talk each others heads off. I like diners. Not a shred of fibre to be found there of course, but made do with immense piles of eggs, bacon, pancakes, sausages and coffee, and I enjoyed the smiling turkey posters for forthcoming Thanksgiving. A lively discussion with MJ about the diner's name. MJ wrongheadedly debating the fact that the dance is actually The Hokey Cokey . Apparently in the American version they poke their butts in and not merely their left leg and so on. No idea which is the authentic one of course, but just found this which suggests that Hokey Cokey was invented to mock Catholicism. Then a lovely walk through woods by the coast to burn off some of the breakfast excesses. A fresh morning and Long Island is beautiful in a highly-coloured late autumn. We walked along discussing haiku, and Buddhism and how we were both big and clever. Afternoon, and an immense bout of playing games
Hurrah. Made it to America. THE most unspeakable flight. Hours of lurching turbulence. Fortunately the pilot said it may be bumpy before we took off so I took my emergency valium -- sadly this had worn off by the time things had got really bad five hours later. The landing too was horrid. Normally I don't mind landings but the lower we got the more the horizon slid up and down and the plane rocked from side to side. The massive air pocket we hit about thirty seconds before landing where the plane dropped like a stone did nobody any good. A wave of hysterical laughter once we had slammed and then lurched horribly on the runway. Disembarking, and one of the first things that always hits me about America is its distinctive smell. It's hard to describe; it's sugary and with a hit of cinnamon. Journey to Kings Park Long Island fairly easy. Travelling around these parts seeming quite familiar these days. Asked directions of a bizarre barking bullfrog-looking woman in the informat
Preparing for my flight to New York. Running about the place. Just back from a fast beer with Anton in The Eddy. Now poking the last bits into my case. Need to be up tomorrow at an unspeakable 4:50am. Increasingly cheery about my visit! Lurked out at lunchtime to buy a new case and en route took this snap of a full-moon-swollen Thames that was threatening to spill over the bank. Foreground Mark, background The Gnome.
Monday morning. Creative department had been moved again and I wandered about the agency till someone told me where they'd put it. Greeted by a nest of boxes and strewn stuff. Hard for me and The Gnome to focus. Flew into a rage with an unfortunate suit. Guilt forced me to go out and buy a bunch of freesias for her to say sorry afterwards. She forgave me. Otherwise nothing much happening. Looking forward massively to seeing MJ! Feeling a tad rubbish physically though. Enjoyed working on a poem, however, rewriting one of the starts I put on here in the spring into something more formed.
Introspective day, very enjoyable but little blogworthy. Working on bits and pieces of poetry and fiddling with other bits of writing. Feeling somewhat run down, and so welcomed a quiet weekend. Spoke to lovely MJ of course and to Anton. When on the phone lately or listening to the radio I have got into the habit of doing bitmap doodles. Some of them end up looking quite pretty.
Up at the crack of dawn cleaning the bathroom to prevent the plumber from contracting cholera when putting in the new toilet bowl. However the toilet bowl was delivered with a chip in it, so it is the bucket business till after I return from the states again. D'oh. Had a tidying frenzy. Threw away lots of things -- ancient payslips and statements from accounts that don't exist any more. Quite therapeutic. Thinking of Alan Sugar's comment that a piece of paper left on a desk represents a decision not made. Am trying to interrogate pieces of paper these days. What are you? Are you the sort of piece of paper that I will ever realistically do anything with? etc. It is a lengthy process. Happy to lie low today. Bumped briefly into Anna and Anton and some friends of theirs. Anton happy to be back in Blighty. Otherwise spent lots of time talking to MJ and my mum on the phone. Remembering with Mum about my grandmother's penchant for practical jokes. I'd forgotten the stor
Thinking about Wilfred Owen who was killed the day before the First World War ended on this day in 1918. I wonder how his poetry would have evolved should he have survived. Started reading The Monk and the Philosopher today on the train, a book Sophie had given me a long time ago but had slipped down the back of the bookcase. Interesting dialogue between a father and a son -- the father a French Philosopher, and his son who became a Buddhist monk who gave up a promising scientific career in research to sit at the feet of Tibetan masters. Disembarking from the train at Victoria, and a touch in the back and a whiff of sulphur and there was Spooner looking brown and slim and exceedingly well. Slitty-eyed twinkle present and correct. Dragged myself into work feeling less than lively. However, the agency has won a few pitches lately and there was a cheery feeling about the place. Caught up with the French Bloke at lunch, and saw Max too. She is very close now to full term. Spoke to lovely
Off work again today with writer's gyp. Ventured out to the quack, and a spot of food shopping as there was little to eat. Slept a lot. Chatted to MJ at lunchtime. I will have to drag my sorry butt back to work tomorrow. At least I didn't have a lengthy work phonecalls in my bed today. Watched a wonderful and traumatising documentary on BBC 2 tonight called The Last Stand . Where a TV crew had unrestricted access the recent pull out of settlers from the Gaza Strip. It was like some Shakespearian tragedy. Militaristic and extremist husband with three guns, and his extremist warrior wife who developed cancer as the stand off developed. I felt incredibly sorry for the settlers. They were incredibly brave but, to my mind, extremist and misguided. I also felt sorry for the soldiers of the Israeli Army who had to go in and drag the people away, and of course the Palestinians in the occupied territory... In fact for everyone. But ended up feeling most sorry for Datya Itzhaki (pictured
Zombie day. Took the day off work feeling wussy. Got roped into a long telephone conversation while in bed about member get member communications, and had to work through some bits with Mike on the phone. Otherwise slept a lot. Slunk out into Brighton for a few provisions. It was bright and nice. Day redeemed by talking to my beautiful MJ. We are most cheery that I will be over there soon. MJ sent me a picture of Carhenge in the Nebraska. Makes me want to write a travel book with her called Stonehenges of America.
Not a blogtastic day. Still feeling a little out of sorts but enjoyed a refresher listen to my brainwashing tape this morning. Work better today and travelled with the Gnome to another agency after hours to presented some concepts which went down quite well. Straight home tonight and managed to relight the boiler after it had been blown out, which was a boon after the ghastly struggles I had with the boiler in Thornton Avenue. Booked my tickets and holiday for a week off to visit MJ. Called her this evening, as she was laughing at Anton who was messaging her from NY. Mineral water tonight thank God. And now, joyously to bed relatively early.
A bit rough and ropy. Sluggish in the brain parts at work, which was a bit frustrating. Had to work hard to be positive today, especially as me and the Gnome had a hideous amount to do. Managed to scrape half an hour to walk by the river which was very enjoyable. Pleasant day, walked along talking to MJ, plotting my next trip to the colonies, as crows and seagulls and geese and ducks and helicopters all made themselves heard. Saw Maddog in the evening. Very good to see Bob, as ever. Had a nice Chinese meal in Soho, and generally caught up, telling me a lot about Milly his daughter, talking about Buddhism and Meister Eckhart. He also nicely gave me a beautifully-presented box of Japanese bean cakes as a belated birthday present. Very tired by the time I got home, and talked to MJ again for a bit before sloping gratefully off to bed.
Bought a new moleskine notebook today. I am very snobby about them. There's something about having a moleskine notebook which gives your jottings the proper respect. Walked down to the sea and sat in the cafe in the company of my new notebook. The weather was wild and stormy with a real gale, and stinging rain. The sky a dark blue grey, which touched the sea and shoreline with dark smudges of rain. The sea was almost khaki green and very rough, as you can see from the pictures. Really enjoyed the drama of it bursting over the groynes. Drank coffee, and watched the big waves roll by the pier for a long time. It felt like being at sea, apart from the fact there was no movement. Afterwards walked down by the sea looking at the strange flotsam. Saw several mermaid's purses, and storm-broken cuttlefish, and odd clumps of shells which I think were broken off barnacles. Matty called me and after I walked home and changed clothes I joined him and Taranjit and Craig in the Battle of Tra
John the plumber & his taciturn sidekick came at 8:30 in the morning. Turns out that the whole toilet needs replacing due to cracks and antique workings. This leaves me struggling with buckets for another week. Talking to John afterwards I learned that he is a passionate diver, and has even won an award for the most dives made, a previous winner being Jacques Cousteau which necessitated him flying to Las Vegas and giving a speech. He told me about swimming with sharks too, to get good photos of them. Had a long chat with MJ today. We are missing each other a great deal. We were feeling very cheerful talking about my next visit and she also floated the idea that Matty boy wasn't to blame for my hangover. I really enjoyed life today. But found there were just not enough hours today to do all the Peter Kenny things I wanted to do. A while ago I started doing some bitmaps with the paint thing on the computer. Now I am doing a bitmap odyssey (a rough first page of which can be seen
Brooding this morning about the badness of Matty. Woke cirque couchant * with what can only be described as a hangover: entirely bad Matty boy's fault. After another long and hard-working day, met Matty and his accomplices at the Reef bar at Victoria. (Also bumped into fellow hack Jez there, who I'd not seen for some time.) Matt and his amigos were off to Brighton this weekend to enjoy the burning of effigies and the fireworks at Lewes . I explained to Matty that I wanted an early night and would melt quickly away once in Brighton. Onto the crowded Brighton train and bad Matty had bought a bag of Magners ciders and a bag of ice and paper cups. I joined Matty and his crew in attending to those uninhibitedly and rather noisily, attracting one or two stony looks as we did so. His accomplices were Taranjit, Jeff and Craig (both American, and both nursing broken hearts. My opening line to Craig was, Hi Craig, how are you and that lovely Chiara getting on? D'oh.) And Bei and her
Me and the Gnome have been hard at work for weeks. My new re-framing approach is working. Before we start any job, I say to the Gnome, "how can we do this quickly and easily", rather than sitting about moaning about it, or expecting it to be a nightmare. This has contributed to us cracking through work at pace, and working better as a team. Broke off to speak to my beloved MJ. The only place I could talk to her was outside and it was blowing a strong gale. Beginning to plan when we next see each other again which is always an exceedingly cheery conversation. In the evening went for a meal as an early celebration of Tracey's birthday. We went to The Old Fire Station again. Incredibly noisy that so ended up lipreading those people not sitting next to me. Apart from the FB of course whose voice can be marvellously penetrating. Other attendees were Bouncy Max, Mandy, Chris and his handily named girlfriend Christine. The evening broke up early, and I caught the 9:30 train to
Watery day. A deluge this morning as I went to the station. The gutter in Guildford Road like a brook. Read all of Lamia by Keats today on the train. Got to the line Martin had used: "Philosophy will clip an Angel's wings" in his lecture at the weekend. A hectic, rather hallucinogenic poem, which for some reason I had never read. With some resonance for Mike too... Philosophy will clip an Angels wings Conquer all mysteries by rule and line, Empty the haunted air and gnomed mine-- The Gnome, blinking in the surface light, and me quickly got ourselves out of the office to work on a rebranding project. Walked in the rain along the river to the Ship where we drank rubbish coffees and mineral waters, ate Thai grub and came up with a few concepts. Slouched back to the office several hours later, a few tiresome conversations and then I was out of the office like a rat up a drainpipe. An hour's walk by the sea tonight. Lovely and rough, with crashing waves. I went to my favo
Mary Jane in court this morning to negotiate for the children being allowed to leave the US. They meet again in a few weeks. Most of the day's thoughts revolving around this. Otherwise lurked at home for the John the Plumber this morning. J the P, peering into the cistern and shaking head, "Nasty!" Me: "What do you expect... It's a toilet." Naturally my cistern needs an obscure type of valve, not a bog standard one (arf!), to be specially delivered. So till Saturday there is an unsavoury struggling with buckets. Into work late. Tired. People kept giving me lots of tedious work to do which was far from optimal. I am on mini-health kick, however, and the Gnome is copying me. For lunch I drank green tea and ate vine tomatoes, and a little humous, and a few oatcakes and fruits. The Gnome consumed a packet of six pitta breads, a family sized tub of humous and a bag of carrots. And writing a short poem about Coventry Cathedral.
Little news: Halloween but I was unhaunted. Quite a quiet day at work, which was welcome. This gave me the opportunity to slip out at lunchtime for an enjoyable swim. In the evening met the old Dell crew Ash, Phil, Arno, Emma, James and Marcella in Soho. Queen Paula missing however through illness. We met in the Crown and Two Chairmen, and then went to the usual curry house. Left early but had another poor journey home. Reading Lamia this morning which I can't remember reading before. As ever Keats' descriptions resonate... Found myself loving this, which had me imagining reflections in marble: While yet he spake they had arrived before A pillar'd porch, with lofty portal door Where hung a sliver lamp, whose phosphor glow Reflected in the slabbed steps below, Mild as a star in water...
Woke up early and it felt enjoyable and familiar sitting in my room with the window open to the grey and rainy morning, drinking instant coffee and writing yesterday’s entry. After a large breakfast, Sophie and me went for a walk in the teeming rain and lurked about on the campus. Then back to Scarman to dry off before the taxi to Coventry. Gallingly realised at the station that I had left my ticket in the hotel. Sophie on the train getting in the Buddhist mood. Arriving at Euston we went straight to Friends House to join a Rigpa event. Rigpa is a Tibetan word with connotations of the innermost nature of the mind as well as intelligence and awareness . It was a two day event but we were able to sneak in for the last quarter – with several hours of teaching by Tibetan Buddhist Minguyur Rinpoche who was 29 and had a funny as well as a wise old soul. He spoke in English, with a translator to help with the trickier bits. Although I am no expert, one of the things I love about Buddhism is